Ghosts Of High School Past

I just got home from a dinner date with high school classmates, one of whom is visiting from abroad.  Although there were just the three of us, we had a lot of fun reminiscing about our younger days and sharing stories about our lives now.  It dawned on me as I was driving home that although we have long been living separate lives, there will always be ties that bind us together, just as some of these also bring up ghosts of our past.

It's been 40 years since we all went our separate ways. Many of us have moved to other places in the Philippines and overseas. Whenever we meet, we always have these memories and new stories to tell but, there is now a subtle difference in our conversations. We have become more honest with each other as we grow older. Take me for instance, I was never part of any clique in high school and I did not have any best friend. I think the main reasons for this was that I had very little in common with my classmates and my parent's were my best friends.  In other words, I was "different" in the sense that I enjoyed being with family more than anything else, I liked doing things on my own, had no time for teen angst, resisted peer pressure and basically did not care if my classmates liked me or not.  Even at that age, I was a very self-assured and confident teen, much to their annoyance.  

guess which one is me?

 

So it was not surprising, to learn many years later, how my classmates perceived me.  But what astonished me was the revelation that some classmates whom I remembered as jolly and sociable, had issues during high school.  These stories or perceptions when brought up during our conversation, are discussed so matter-of-factly, and many of my classmates say that they were aware of these issues even then.  Huh? Really?  Was I the only one who was clueless about what was happening around me during those times?  Well, if I was,  this tells me that I was even more out of the loop than I thought I was.

Last night's conversation even proved it more.  There were just so many things about my classmates that I never knew.  But the best part of not knowing is that I had no bad memories of high school.  When they tell me now, that back then they found me so annoying because I was a tattletale, I would laugh so hard because that trait never left me...I am still talkative, infuriatingly honest, frank to the point of tactlessness and yes, these continues to get me into "trouble".  But hey! I now strive hard to be more circumspect, more prudent...my new mantra, is "hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil".  LOL!

We have changed a lot since high school. Whatever hurts, or ill feelings we had for each other or our teachers are long gone. We can now talk about the past and even laugh about the bad times.  Whatever our lives are today, I'd like to believe that we now  understand each other better.  Our reunions, small though they may be, have given us a chance to heal old wounds, rediscover old friendships and develop new ones. Above all, we have become women of substance.